I was slightly surprised to learn that all of my fellow tutors at Conyer Elementary are not only addressed by their first name, but also along with the required prefix. For example, I would be called Mr. Zack by all of my students. The name however hasn't stuck yet, seeing that the children would much rather call me by the nickname that appeared on my first interaction with a student. From that point forward I was called Shaggy, as in Shaggy from Scooby Doo.

Yeah, I can kind of see it.

The first question I received was, "where's you're dog Shaggy?"

"Well," I said, for some reason still wanting to be answer the question seriously, "I actually do have a dog at home." Immediately I envisioned myself solving mysteries with a welsh corgi at my side.

"Is he riding in the Mystery Machine?" They quickly replied.

I stood back in amazement that these children even knew who Scooby Doo was, and that he did in fact ride in a van named The Mystery Machine.

After that I instructed my kids to call me just like they would any teacher, with respect, because the name Mr. Zack is so very respectful.

The next day I was approached by one of my students who during recess stopped to survey me with an analytical eye before saying, "You know, you remind me of someone in a book I read..."

"Oh really!" I exclaimed while thinking to myself that this means two very good things:

1. This child was actually reading.


2. I was probably someone cool like Sherlock Holmes, or Gandalf.

"What book?" I asked him.

"I'll show you in class!" He said excitedly.

I had nearly forgotten about the entire interaction until later in the day when I was called over to his desk.

"Mr. Zack! I found the book I was talking about!"

"Oh really!" I said excited.


The boy at that moment opened up his copy of the Guinness Book of World Records to show me the one page on which I would truly belong. In large type at the top I read: PEOPLE WITH THE BIGGEST NOSES.

I said nothing for a moment, and then closed my eyes and nodded. "NICE." I said. "Nice one."

Children can be so cruel.