Spring break is coming up and right before it arrives we get to look forward to the onslaught of midterms and papers. This week let's learn how to deal with this usually stressful time.
Monday - Decide to Study Day
Midterms are just around the corner, so it's time to buckle down and start studying. But first you need to check your Facebook. Take a look at all the status updates until you come across the profile of your arch nemesis. Write an anonymous death-threat in their honesty box application. While you're at it, check your old Myspace profile too. Reject every spam friend request and then vow never to check Myspace again. Use stumble-upon for the next several hours.
Tuesday - Reading Day
It can be expected that every course you're taking this semester has reading from required texts. On this day you might want to consider actually buying the books and then reading them. When you discover how expensive the books are begin gagging and resolve to find the books at the library. Find out the library does not have the books you need and then discover the wonders of wikipedia. Since you're already online you might as well check your Facebook while you're at it.
Wendsday - Get a Good Sleep Night
If you're going to do well on these exams you're going to need to get a good rest each night. On this day resolve to go to bed at least before 11'oclock. Realize by 10:55 you can still fit in a quick round of playing Golden Eye against the roommates before calling it a day. At midnight realize you can't go to bed hungry so take a late night trip to Molca Salsa. At one o'clock begin to regret that shrimp burrito. Later, update your Facebook status to "is throwing up from Molca Salsa shrimp burrito." At 9:30 realize you have to get to chapel.
Thursday - Study Off Campus Day
There are just too many distractions in your dorm room. On this day get off campus and study at your local La Mirada cafe. Before opening that book drink a couple iced-coffee's until your bladder feels like it's going to explode. Realize that the cafe gets free wireless internet. Check Facebook and update status to "is exploding iced coffee bladder."
Friday - Swear Off Facebook Day
Facebook has brought you nothing but pain and misery. Besides, you haven't even gotten that many notifications anyway this week and the ones that you did were only in regards to your "strengths and weaknesses." Give it up for a couple days for the sake of your grades. Open up your text book and begin doodling in the margins. realize that the corners of the pages could make for a great flipbook.
Weekend - Rest Assured Days
Well, you've done all you could. Whether you've already taken all of your exams, or still have a few left, rest assured knowing that you have studied to the best of your capabilities, which as a college student are surprisingly limited. Pray to God that there was some confusing mixup with the exams and then begin to look forward to Spring Break. Realizing you have so much time on your hands, decide that you might as well check your myspace page.