Day By Day - End of the Semester To-Do List
Spring Break has just ended and now that we're finally used to getting back to classes it's time that the semester must come to an end. Let Day by Day help organize your life in this hectic time.
Day One - Sell Your Books Day
Now that the semester is coming to a close you'll finally have the time you need to actually read all the text books you bought three months ago. Now you have the choice of selling them or even better, not selling them. On this day just accept the fact that by the time you get that hundred dollar book onto Amazon the newest version will be released and make it's monetary value roughly equal to that of a DVD box set of Yahoo Serious movies. Such is life. Use them to hold up the broken end of your couch.
Day Two - Find a Place to Live Day
Although a cardboard box behind Home Depot is always an option, it's generally a good idea to look for a place to live before you get kicked out of your dorm for the summer. Remember that home is where the heart is, especially when that home is a two bedroom apartment located in a crime rampant neighborhood. On this day question whether cheap rent really is worth an arm and a leg.
Day Three - Box Up Your Belongings Day
No, you don't remember buying those leather pants at Savers, but you did, and on this day you'll discover so many other possessions you never knew you had as you pack away all of your belongings. After stuffing as much as you can into one box, be sure to wrap it in several layers of tape before it explodes from its sides.
Day Four - Send Out Your Resume Day
It's time to dream of a life filled with more substance than a Cup of Noodles. On this day do what your parents have been continually reminding you to do by finally getting a job. Discover the fine line between the job description of just "babysitter" and it's equivalent "ad interim infant supervisor, chaperon and provisory day-care provider/governess" as you desperately try to spice up the few jobs you've had. Business cards may be an extraneous expense, yet they add a sense of undeniable superiority. Be sure to constantly wear a bluetooth cell-phone to further emphasize your importance in the business world.
"let's never speak again."
Day Five - Burn Your Bridges Day
The semester is ending and to be honest, you really don't ever seeing yourself taking another Biology class ever again. So on this day feel free to show how you really feel towards those core credit requirements, possibly by dragging the now out-of-date text books from the back of your car and driving circles in the parking lot. Then later realize you have the same professor next year and smack your forehead.
Day Six - Quality Bonding Day
On this day spend time with all your friends new and old as you remember the good times you've had over the past semester. Reminisce over a meal of burritos at Molca Salsa and relish the taste of fellowship. Then get the gang together for one last round of Super Smash Bros. Be sure to turn off the system right after winning a game to end the semester as a winner, you deserve it.